Commit or Quit

Paul LeBoeuf returns to document his Indy Ball dream. We haven’t heard from him in a while, so what’s happened?

It’s true there’s no “I” in team but there is one in commitment. When you have a dream or a goal, it’s your own commitment that matters the most. Just being committed in your head isn’t enough. You have to be in every avenue possible. Unfortunately I’m come up a bit short in two of mine: Time and Money.

I’m a father of two who works 2nd shift. During the week I have my children each day from 6:45am until 4pm. I then work from 4pm till midnight. Weekend are usually family time, which leaves little for me. Obviously raising a family isn’t cheap, nor is chasing a dream in Indy Ball.

These are the two biggest roadblocks I face. I didn’t have an answer and I retreated from training and mentioning anything baseball related on social media. I became a ghost and began to wonder if my dream ever existed at all. In a last ditch effort I did some serious soul searching.I Icame to the realization that a roadblock always has another route around it. Thinking otherwise is just an excuse . Excuses lead to a standstill. A standstill leads to no progress, and ultimately that leads to regret. That’s not the feeling I want.

So I’ve revamped my approach. Need to solve time. I will now awaken at 5am each day to train. It isn’t pretty but I’ll make it presentable. Who needs sleep anyway? I’m joking and I know rest is important but I’ll rest later. Moving on to finances. I already work full time but I’ve taken on some additional work part time over the weekends. I now have 4 jobs…wait what? Yup 4! My fiancé isn’t convinced this is a good idea so I will attempt to convince her otherwise. I need to strike a work/family balance and dammit, I will. I’m chasing this dream once and some sacrifices are needed. I’ll basically have zero social life over the next year but that’s ok. My aspirations are bigger than that.

I’ve hit a point where I need to go extreme or go home. I’ve met so many great people along this journey and I have supporters that I just refuse to let down. I also need accountability so I plan on checking in each day. I want to capture the raw emotion of chasing this dream. I want to laugh and cry and share every feeling I have along the way. I want the good days and the bad days given their due credit.

So I make this pledge. I will put my soul into this. I will open my heart and my life to anyone who cares to take a peek. You will see me smile, you will see my tears, you will see my sweat, but most importantly you will see me try. I may succeed or I may not. But… nobody will ever be able to say I didn’t give it a go. Dreams are made for those who are willing to chase them. Those who sit back, live in a personal nightmare that they will never awaken from.

Leave a Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.