The Official MLB Playoffs Survival Kit

Pinch-hitting with the Playoffs Survival Kit that we need this month is recurring contributor (and dare we suggest rather nervous Red Sox fan) Adam Perry.

Its that time of year again, when baseball fans up and down the country enter an October state of exhaustion…jetlag without the travel. Here are some tips and tricks on how best to survive the playoff season, and those late nights and early mornings.

1. Go to the games

Job done, you lucky people! You are in the right time zone so no need to worry about baseball jetlag (unless of course you end up suffering from genuine jetlag). Sadly, this is not an option for most of us, who would need to answer some serious questions from our family, work and the bank manager.

2. Record the games to watch the next day

A dangerous ploy… If you are reading this, I am assuming you consume your baseball news via any media possible. Although MLB TV now gives you the option to hide the scores, you will require a complete lock-down of all electrical and communication devices. Even if you think you are safe on your commute to work, fate will transpire that you sit next to the one baseball fan on the train, who is on the phone bragging to his mate about his late night watching his beloved New York Yankees. Don’t take the risk

3. Pull a ‘sickie’

Another dangerous game… If you have been strutting around work over the past few weeks wearing your favourite teams cap bragging to everyone’s bemusement that YOU are going to the World Series, it only takes a swift google search by a conscientious boss to diagnose your sudden illness. Even if it does work, you will need to choose tactically, depending on the progress of your team, don’t be like the Cubs and blow your wildcard too early.

4. Support the Baltimore Orioles

You stopped caring about baseball a long time ago.

5. Stimulants

Relive your GCSE’s by popping pro plus and downing Red Bull to keep you going during the day. Side effects however, include restlessness, irritation and completely forgetting all your vocab during your French oral. (at the time of writing, I do not believe that the Batflips Team would condone any narcotics of a stronger nature).

6. Radio Times

Some people prefer to listen to the radio commentary in bed, snoozing intermittently throughout the games. If you talk in your sleep however, this approach is fraught with danger as you wake up next to your partner in the morning, who insists on knowing who Mookie is, and why you love him so.

7. The Power Nap

If you are one of the lucky people able to practise this type of witchcraft, this could be a genuine option. The ideal time required, according to the experts, is between 10 – 20 minutes. Anything longer than this will bring on sleep inertia and leave you feeling more tired than you were before, kind of like watching Pedro Baez pitch for the Dodgers.

8. Eating well

Supplements shouldn’t just be reserved for A-Rod. Getting the right vitamins and foods could really help avoid the daily tiredness. Vitamin B and Iron are your ‘go to’ tablets. As far as food is concerned, more peanuts and less crackerjacks. Alcohol is a ‘no go’, but some things are just not worth the sacrifice.

9. Bright lights

Not ideal for the electricity bill but keeping it bright in your living area is proven to help you stay awake longer. Imagine your room resembles the sun-drenched dome of Tropicana Field, but with more fans!

10. Power through

The record for staying awake is 11 days and 5 hours, held by Randy Gardner, a high school student from San Diego in 1964. He has been asleep ever since and will only wake-up when the Padres win the World Series. Goodnight everybody!

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