Oh Crumbs! Biscuits and Baseball (Part 2)

My ramblings about which biscuit best represents each MLB team and why continues! You may remember that this madness was sparked after a pre-podcast chat amongst the @tesbuk gang where we discussed the merits of various biscuits.  If you have no idea what I’m talking about, you can find Part 1 here.

Part 2

Arizona Diamondbacks – Wagon Wheels: What do you see when you think of Arizona? Deserts? Cactuses? People riding wagon carts pulled by horses? These images may well not represent Arizona so much now but these were the images we were very often fed by old country and western films shown on TV. Aside from this, the colours of the Wagon Wheel are very closely matched to the Diamondbacks uniform – red, white, sand and black (dark brown in the biscuit’s case).

Atlanta Braves – Country biscuits (I cheated a little here!): Nothing says the Deep South better than biscuits and gravy. As MLB’s only true southern team it’s only right for it to be represented by its very own local biscuit. The ingredients have a high melting point, similar to the hardy Braves fans who withstand the hot Georgia sun during summer ball games.

Minnesota Twins/Cleveland Indians – Rich Tea: An underrated biscuit for two underrated Cities. The Rich Tea is very often overlooked in favour of more exciting biscuits. Likewise, Minnesota and Cleveland have never been considered go-to holiday destinations. While both cities and biscuit may be underwhelming in appearance, they are not to be written off. When dunked into a brew, the Rich Tea can withstand the heat. Leave it in for too long however, it will begin to show signs of weakness and start to crumble. The same can be said for the Twins and the Indians. Both tend to perform strongly during the regular season, with the Twins winning seven division titles and the Indians winning five since 2000. Looking beyond that, the Indians can lay claim to an American League Pennant in 2016, but otherwise there’s not a lot to shout about. The Twins haven’t won a World Series since 1991 and continue to suffer at the hands of the Yankees when they do reach the playoffs, while the Indians haven’t won it all since 1948!

San Francisco Giants – Macarons: A biscuit that can as quickly be on trend with foodies as not. They are eye-catching and beautiful. However, there is not much substance or flavour. It has been argued that at times we can choose what we eat purely based on how the food looks. San Francisco is a beautiful city, with a beautiful ballpark. It would be easy for anyone with no natural ties in America to plump for this team. Just like Macarons, the Giants seem to come in and out of trend in the baseball world, based on their success at the time. Their World Series wins in 2010, 2012 and 2014 saw new groups of ‘bandwagon’ fans gravitating towards this team. But, despite having arguably one of the nicest ballparks in baseball – who doesn’t love those views over McCovey Cove – it lacks the intensity and the atmosphere that can often be found at the ballpark of their Bay Area rivals in Oakland.

Milwaukee Brewers – Choco Leibniz: A luxurious looking biscuit from Germany. Perfect for a city that has 40% of its population claiming German ancestry. Milwaukee is famed for its brewing traditions which was started by German immigrants in the city. The Milwaukee Brewers have also bought into this German heritage with Bernie Brewer as their mascot and a focus on beer, pretzels and sausages at their ballgames. The Brewers have probably one of the nicest ballparks, logos and sets of uniforms in baseball. With a navy blue, yellow and royal blue colourway its easy to see why this might be the case.

Chicago Cubs  – Cadbury Chocolate Animals: A fun well known biscuit which you wouldn’t necessarily choose to stand the heat of being dunked. The Cubs, the ‘Lovable Losers’ who spent over 100 years waiting for their next World Series win. A fact so well known it was written into lore in popular culture thanks to Back To The Future II. This Chicago team puts a lot of emphasis on the Cubs aspect of their name – whether it be their changing logo over the years, Clark the bear cub mascot or Mr Cub himself, Ernie Banks.

Los Angeles Angels – Wafers: Often seen as weak and bland. They can be dressed up with exciting ingredients such as ice cream and chocolate but, this doesn’t essentially change what the biscuit actually is. The Los Angeles Angels last won the World Series in 2002. They had a good run in the West Division during the early 2000s and won it again in 2014. But, despite having mega stars such as Albert Pujols, Shohei Ohtani, Mike Trout, and Justin Upton in their lineup, the Angels have come nowhere near winning a World Series.

Kansas City Royals – Ginger Nut: Crunchy, bold, with lots of spice. Kansas City is known for its BBQ food with full-on flavours, whether sweet, spicy, smoky or tangy. It is also known for its Jazz Museum and Negro Leagues Baseball Museum. The latter pays homage to some of the biggest and boldest characters in baseball such as Leroy ‘Satchel’ Paige, Cool ‘Papa’ Bell and Jackie Robinson. The Kansas City Royals celebrate all things BBQ at Kauffman Stadium selling BBQ nachos, BBQ pork fries and pulled pork rolls. They also don the Kansas City Monarchs uniform every season in honour of the city’s Negro League team. It has been said that the Kansas City Royals play the game the Negro League way – smallball and plenty of stolen bases.

San Diego Padres – Nice Biscuit: Sugary, sweet and enjoyable. San Diego as a city has a lot going for it. Ballplayers often comment that it’s a nice city to live. It’s known as a great holiday destination too. The Padres have a beautiful ballpark and the brown and gold uniform is one of the nicest in baseball. They have exciting players on their roster such as Fernando Tatis Jr, Manny Machado, and Tommy Pham. But all this does not escape the fact that the Padres have never won a World Series and end up coming last in their division more often than not. I guess it’s true what they say, nice guys do finish last.

This is just a bit of fun. I would love to hear what your thoughts are on this topic. You can contact me on twitter: @Team52UKFan.

Leave a Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.