The Red Sox lost two of three games to open the season against the Baltimore Orioles. The Orioles were last seen losing in the AL Wildcard in 2016, although they probably kept playing and losing since then. It’s hard to thrash the Angry O’s when they just took two out of three to open the season, but here we are.
I’ve been worried about the Red Sox pitching staff. I’ve been worried about them since before COVID-19 was an active concern. I’ve been worried about them since I wrote about Chris Sale getting a second opinion on his elbow. I’ve been worried about them since they didn’t get anything resembling a pitching prospect back in the Mookie Betts trade. I’ve been very worried about the long-term health of Eduardo Rodriguez.
Frankly, I’m of the opinion that there shouldn’t be any season of any sport due to COVID-19 concerns. If they’re going to play, though, I will pay attention. In fact, as I write this, reports are coming out about Philadelphia Phillies, which compound the situation with the Miami Marlins.
The Phillies have canceled all workouts today at Citizens Bank Park after a coach and home clubhouse staffer tested COVID-19 positive.
— Matt Gelb (@MattGelb) July 30, 2020
Lest you think I’m all doom and gloom, I do have some good news. I know what the Red Sox need to do to fix their pitching staff and bring some much-needed excitement into their 2020 season, sign Bartolo Colon!
Yes, he’s 47, and yes, he would like to pitch this season, having made his desire to retire with the Mets known earlier this year. But what if the Met’s don’t have the need? Bartolo Colon did pitch for the Red Sox in 2008, with a 4-2 record. I’m not sure if you’re aware, but the Red Sox are trawling the lower depths for pitching help and aren’t catching anyone in their net with an ERA lower than 5.00.
Ryan Webber only managed 3⅔ innings, walking three and allowing six runs on six hits on Sunday, and Martin Perez didn’t fare much better on Saturday, going five innings with five hits and five runs.
Colon may not be able to shoulder the full load of even a shortened season, but he can give innings to the staff, and offer some invaluable advice on pitching, fun, and probably even life lessons.
He’s always been able to bring something of value to a team. Who can forget his one career home run with the Mets in 2016?
Bartolo wouldn’t get the chance to hit this season on any club due to the DH rules in place, but he could certainly leave fans with a lasting impression of his professionalism and joy for the game of baseball, and with any luck, a few wins for the Red Sox pitching staff.
Mr Colon was last seen with the Texas Rangers in 2018, with 24 starts and a 7-12 record, which may very well be enough to make him the ace of this current Red Sox staff, no disrespect intended to Nathan Eovaldi.
Thanks for reading, and please be safe out there.
Ben King is a guest writer for Bat Flips and Nerds. Follow him on Twitter @yeoldbigben
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this is satire, right?